


Nothing good happens after 2 in the morning

by qtmabu



Series: Pills for cold, meals for hunger (me for you) [1]
Category: NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at Humor, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, and relationships as well, mention of pedophilia but there is NO pedo here, minhyun does not actually appear but is implied here, more characters will be added at some points
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-07
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-11-29 00:35:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11429502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qtmabu/pseuds/qtmabu
Summary: Jonghyun would make sure to block that number tomorrow. The man should have known better that nothing good happened after 2 in the morning.





	Nothing good happens after 2 in the morning

**Author's Note:**

> Broduce 101 resurrects me to get back to writing again after years of hiatus LOL.  
> Failed attempt is failed, but if you do come across this story and actually start reading it then I hope it does not disappoint too much.  
> Btw, hwangje means emperor. And this one shot is based on a Vietnamese facebook post I saw few days ago. Sorry there is no English translation for it :(

It all started with a simple greeting message Jonghyun received out of the blue in a hot summer night. The man was making himself comfortable on bed when his phone dinged that distinct sound of "katalk" and in retrospect Jonghyun should have known better to not pick up.

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Hi there :D_

**_2.07am_ **

It took Jonghyun a while to stare at the user name and display picture of a smiling golden retriever to make sure that yes, he definitely did not know the other and yes he must be texting with some narcissistic shit because who just named himself as hwangje, seriously???

Well aside from Ong Seungwoo who had his user name as _jeongmaljinjjarealdaebakheolwanjeon_god._

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_Hi._

_Sorry but do I know you?_

**_2.09am_ **

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Oh, Blued?_

_I saw you there :D_

**_2.09am_ **

Jonghyun’s ears burnt as embarrassment settled in the pit of his stomach at the mention of the account. Kang Freaking Dongho who decided to help by creating one for him with the thought that Jonghyun was living more and more like a miserable, lonely, austere monk. The shorter man would beg to differ, he just did not feel like dating anyone at the moment and being an Education major was no help either. Jonghyun had this firm belief, which almost bordered with religious faith, that since he was supposed to be a teacher, a dependable mentor for youngsters in the next few years, it would be very immoral if the man just hooked up recklessly and did not manage himself.

(“A walking combo of a prude and baldie, okay i get you.”

“Shut up Kang Dongho. My grandpa is not bald my dad is not bald there is no way I am going to go bald!!!”)

Now, as stated above, Jonghyun was not the type who would date anyone without thorough consideration, because he was not that thirsty. It had been a while since he last dated someone, though, and at least this guy did not jump on him immediately (yet) like some other accounts he had come across on tinder (the things they said made him 100% mortified and concerned rather than aroused and interested). And he even made his display photo a retriever. How cute. People who set dog photos were definitely not bad people, unless they shared some psychopathic traits similar to Ted Bundy.

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Hey, you there? : <_

**_2.16am_ **

His phone buzzed with notification of new message. Jonghyun did not realize he had been sitting there dazing off that long.

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_Yeah, sorry._

_I was out to get some stuffs._

**_2.17am_ **

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Okay._

_Thought you was not interested :D_

_Anyway._

**_2.17am_ **

_Hwangje sent you an attachment._

Why did the other send him an image attachment at this hour? Jonghyun gulped nervously at the innumerable possibilities of what this image could turn out. Just when he thought this guy was decent, the man was immediately proved wrong after receiving a dick pic. Oh wait he had not even opened the picture yet how could he be so sure that it was a dick pic? What if it was a ghost photo or picture of death animals? That should be one hundred times creepier and more concerning and to be honest Jonghyun was not really sure if he had the guts to ope-

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Just my selca don’t worry ;)_

**_2.18am_ **

Oh.

The winking face usually should give off creepy vibe but somehow the message alone assured Jonghyun immediately. The man clicked on the photo, almost laughing at himself for being pathetically overdramatic for no particular reason.

And wow.

Now Jonghyun was sure he had hit a jackpot because if this was not a stunt and the selca he was staring at was not overly photoshopped then a really attractive man jut befriended him with the intention of dating? Or courting, whatever it was. That, if all the features in the photo were not a bunch of lie and Jonghyun were not hallucinating or high. The man in the photo did look a bit on the younger side, had not shed off all his baby fat yet but having his fair share of experience from being friend with a I-look-fifteen-but-I-could-be-your-daddy dude had taught Jonghyun to not judge a book by its cover.

(Talking about Youngmin, the man was still asked for his ID card every time going to cinema for R-rated movies. It was embarrassing for Youngmin, yet entertaining for Minki and Dongho. Those sadists.)

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_You are very handsome._

**_2.20am_ **

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Of course, thank you ;)_

_And you yourself are not bad either._

_Saw your profile already :D_

**_2.21am_ **

Now he might not be talking to a creep, but a low-key narcissistic version of Seungwoo for sure.

Well, at least the man said he was good-looking though. Jonghyun could not help but grin as another blush crept up to his neck and the butterflies in his stomach just fluttered more.

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_So speak, do you wanna hook up?_

**_2.22am_ **

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_Wow you sure are really open about this..._

**_2.22am_ **

"Open" was an understatement there, in Jonghyun's point of view. At this point his face was definitely burning and he was certain that the heat alone could make a decent dish of scrambled egg already. The man was really really not that much of a prude to actually act all spluttered about a mere hook-up message. Jonghyun was friend with Kang Dongho who literally had no filter for his facial expressions, or impulsive acts for God’s sake! Or maybe it was just that Dongho’s level of straight-forwardness had reached the point of coming off as being rude, rather than attractive and honest. And don’t even start with Minki he was just a sassy little shit. There was no ounce of friendly straight-forwardness coming from the younger man at all (aka consideration for hurting Jonghyun’s “poor, lonely and old heart”).

To say that Jonghyun was surprised at the possibility of someone wanting to date him is an understatement. The man was totally unprepared and shook. It had been a while since he got some (Jonghyun literally cringed at the thought), and usually it was through his friends. No one had never just gone online one day, seeing his selca and thinking that he was hot enough to start texting him.

(Jonghyun could already picture Dongho having that hand gesture of Ms. Universe greeting and the sound of “All hails King Baekho and his brilliant idea of Blued for Kim Jonghyun”.)

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_He he, it saves time, doesn’t it? ;)_

_Anw, now I read that you are majoring in Secondary Education, right?_

**_2.24am_ **

Get back to your creep detector mode Kim Jonghyun!!! Jonghyun’s mind blared off with red light warningly as he stared at the text in confusion. He should have noticed from the first place already, with this excessive amount of winking emo usage. Why did this guy wanted to know if he was really studying Education??? Was he a fan of teacher-student kink because that was a big No, No, No and No. Jonghyun would never ever let that happen. He was a man of morality and noblesse he had to protect the holiness of his possible job career and the innocence of future generations.

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_Sorry but may I know why you are interested in my major?_

**_2.25am_ **

_Hwangje is typing…_

Jonghyun did not even realize he was holding his breath while waiting for the other’s reply. It took a while for the answer to come, and when it did he almost threw his phone out of the window with a shriek.

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Actually I am in high school._

**_2.27am_ **

 

_WHAT THE FUCK!!!_

 

**_From Onibugi:_ **

_Are you kidding me????_

_WHAT THE_

_You want money or what???_

**_2.27am_ **

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Just chill, dude._

**_2.27am_ **

 

_DON’T DUDE ME YOU ARE FREAKING YOUNGER THAN ME AT LEAST FIVE FREAKING YEARS OH MY FREAKING GOD!!!_

 

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_It’s not that_

_I mean_

_We can hook up_

_And then after that you will help me with my homework_

_I have a bunch of Algebra, Biology and Chemistry as well_

_You are going to be a teacher you should help me!!!_

**_2.31am_ **

 

_ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???_

_IS THIS SOME KINDS OF JOKE???_

 

Jonghyun knew he would cry a river for throwing his phone across the room that recklessly. But it was something to be done tomorrow after having a long night recollecting his last bit of sanity and shame.

“Oh my God, a high schooler…”

_Fuck my life..._

Jonghyun uncharacteristically whined as he buried his face deeper into the pillow. He even cursed, three times already. And there, he almost thought the other was hot. Only almost!!! Shame and guilt settled in the pit of Jonghyun’s stomach, while his mouth felt dry like sand paper. He could not help but feel like he had just committed pedophilia. Jonghyun could not believe he had just received such soliciting offer, coming from a kid, in exchange for homework no less. What did he do back when Jonghyun was still a high schooler? Aside from going school, he remembered binge watching anime most of the times, doing homework **_himself_** , and going out with **_his peers_** once in a while. No mingling with older men, let alone asking favor from them like **_this_**.

What did they feed kids these days even?

Ew.

Ew.

The sanctity of his future career, please descend to the earth and protect him from the evilness and corruption of modern society. He was seriously in need of a baptism.

Jonghyun would make sure to block that number tomorrow. The man should have known better that nothing good happened after 2 in the morning.

 

 

**_From Hwangje:_ **

_Why don’t you answer my text anymore?_

_Hyung?_

_…._

_Jonghyun hyung?_

**_2.57am_ **


End file.
